What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

George Zimmerman walks into a bar .

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

Neither have I

what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

Poop

What happends to a monkey without arms.. He bleeds..

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

Your Momma is so fat that she will most like lose a leg to diabetes which is totally preventable if she eats a well balanced diet. I hope she loses weight. Say hi to her from me please.

Spinabifita

A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

Chocolate rain Awesome!

What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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