And more;

What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

9

Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black man.

Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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