What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

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24

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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Black people

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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Where did the watch-dog take the blind man on Saturday afternoon? Wherever the blind man wanted to go

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Whats an Anti-Joke? Funny

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

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What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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