knock knock who's there? be. be who? *hits you with a batterang. BECAUSE ITS BATMAN

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who is mark

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how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

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What do you call a black priest? A black priest

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

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Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

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Whats that cool sound it makes when you thumbs a comment?

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Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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