Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

i don't get it...none of these are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Yes!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What is White over Black? Society.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

trumpy trumpy trump

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

thumb_up thumb_down +34

wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

The biggest joke in anti-joke are these two MOST FAVED What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. +17662 likes MOST HATED whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven -1714 dislikes GUESS WHAT : they are both jew jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

knock knock who's there Berry Joe Berry Joe who? I just told you, Berry Joe. oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops