I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you BUT The roses are wilting The violets are dead The sugar bowl's empty And so is your head

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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Take off your shoes.

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What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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learn the ropes?

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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