How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

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why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? There is no best time, it is based on personal opinion and depending whether or not you have a conflicting schedule

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

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What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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