Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

Okay, one second.

24!

what did the black man say to the white man? hi

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

So a seal walks into a club..

Whats an Anti-Joke? Funny

Wanna hear a joke? A Republican political activist.

Little Jimmy has 100 candy bars, and he eats 95 of them. What dies little Jimmy have? Diabetes

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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