What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

Sorry boss

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

guess what? chicken butt.

what do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A: a piolt

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

i don't get it...none of these are funny.

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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