Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

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A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

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What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

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What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

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Nippies

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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