What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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A tiger walks into a bar, the patrons ran out terrified.

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A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from the black man

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People Order Our Patties

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops