What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

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Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

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Shane Murchan is GAY ..... :L

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What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

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its my money!, but i dont need it right away

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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knock knock who's there interupting black woman interu- MMMMHHHHHMMMM

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

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Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

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what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

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3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops