OMG guess what she just told me!! idk......im deaf.

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What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

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Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

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What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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A guy trips a blind man.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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