Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

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69

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Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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fack me in the ace! CC

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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LOL May Wong

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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Why did the man not open his door to the trick or treaters? He was a sex offender and it was illegal for him to open it...

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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Bloody kids ...

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

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How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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