Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

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A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

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a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

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A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

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I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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