Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

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What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? bullshit!!

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A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

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Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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I hate blackniggers

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wood cant chuck wood

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Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

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A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

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What's gay and ugly? An ugly gay.

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? He looked at his gas bill.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

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Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Spanish Inquisition.

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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