Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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Why was the black man put in jail? Because he escaped.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

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What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

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A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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JUSTIN BIEBER PERFUME!

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Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

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What did Bush say to Obama was elected? I'm going to have you assassinated.

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Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops