Roses are red, Violets are red, I'm bleeding, Shit.

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Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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A family of aristocrats walks into a talent agency and shows their performance. The talent agent asks: "How do you call yourselves?" They say: "The Aristocrats", "because that's what we are; Aristocrats."

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The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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I pooped my pants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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