What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

porn-hub

thumb_up thumb_down -7

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

YOLO.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 killed 9.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo Momma is so fat that she is heavier than most other women her age

thumb_up thumb_down -9

when do you know your a BOSS................ when you get a promotion

thumb_up thumb_down -9

if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do get when you cross a lion and tiger? A liger. This hybrid mammal, only observed in captivity, is the largest of all known felines and is thought to be sterile.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

thumb_up thumb_down -9

THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops