Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

whats bright and yellow? the sun.

Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

whats a dexter whats a died? HaHaHaHaHa Im so so funny

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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