What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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matt shut up

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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ObamaCare

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

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How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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What's black, white and red all over? A popular novel printed in multiple languages.

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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