Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

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A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

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Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

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A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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