What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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Watch your lips.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realizing the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's worse than eating cows. Death

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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What's red and u drink it Koolaid

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knock knock

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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Gestapo.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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