Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

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What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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Emily Brunelle is skinny

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

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y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

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Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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(Family sat down at table) *Child goes to start a story* - "I have a ginger friend.." Everyone bursts out laughing and leaves the child confused.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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