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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

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http://anti-joke.com/

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Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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What do you call a blond british girl a blond britishngirl

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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your mamma so fat she is homosexual... hahaha to bad u will get last in her

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

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Where is my tractor?

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Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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Women's Sports

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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who likes it up the anus? jason frisone at saybrook ave 08094 williamstown new jersey thats who

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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