whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the mushroom jock say to the mushroom nerd? your and ugly wimpy mushroom....and i am on steroids

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Mmmmmmmmbutch

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock, knock. Come in.......

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

thumb_up thumb_down +18

wanna hear a joke? not really

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Watch your lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops