How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

My mom just died....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Chuck Norris. I'm Done. That's my joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Like this joke

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

thumb_up thumb_down +15

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

don't look behind you

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Thumbs down if you like this anti-joke!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops