Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

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mooooh im a cow

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What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

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What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

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- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.....

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

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Whats the difference between boyscouts and jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

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A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

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I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

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What's 6+2? 16

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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