Passing by

Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

What's green and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

Starter clothing

what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

Doorknob.?/111111!!!!hrfuasdyfgasdkhfgawihbrtpaeyrgfai;yegf;gtf L Like or I will killl you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

what do you call a retarded italian Niko

Anti jokes SUCK!

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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