Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

Allie said yesssssssss!

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

Anything Dane Cook says

What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

126

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...