knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road The light was green

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do u shit With ur ass

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three facts 1. You are reading this. 2. You realized that is a stupid fact. 3. You are leaving because this was a stupid joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A woman should not be in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Whats worse than 8 babies in one bin? A: 1 babies in 8 bins

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops