What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

I'm going to Re-write History... History

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

What happened on December 7, 1941 in Hawaii? People celebrated the 100th anniversary of December 7, 1841

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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