I like my coffee the same way I like my woman with big tits I lied about the woman

Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You finish on her teddy bear.

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

Q: What do you get when you put an ice cube, a grasshopper, a cell phone battery, and a human finger in a freezer? A: A very strange mix of objects indeed.

see ya

What's white and very boney? A bone

what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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