What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

4,000 yaks escaped from the zoo

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

guess what what? nothing.

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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