A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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I saw a chameleon. Then it died

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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Yeah, totally.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

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What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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women's rights.

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What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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