What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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A jew, an Arab, and A Scientist walk into a bar. The arab self explodes and kills them all

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

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Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Sex. That is all.

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Who has downs this joke

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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Your mom is so poor, she contributes to the high unemployment of the country and didn't even have enough money to feed her family so Social Services came in and took them away

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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Why does World of Warcraft advertise on Anti-Joke? Because World of Warcraft is funny in anticlimactic and alternative way

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This is my joke. funny

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

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W.N.B.A.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Hi my name is Burp -you can call me Bu Nice to meet you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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