There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

A man walks into a bar. The other two ducked, and then immediately called an ambulance.

Three guys are in the desert. They find a lamp, they rub it, and a genie appears. The genie says "I'll grant each of you a wish." So the first guy says "I want to return to my family in my native country." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The second guy says "I want to live in Hollywood, be famous and rich, and have dozens of girls around me." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The third guy says "I want to go to Hawaii." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. So all three guys end up being happy.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

What's better than a pile of dead babies? Anything.

roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

There was a girl who dumped her diver boyfriend because she couldn’t get him to give her a pearl out of an oyster. This particularly female has rather high expectations for her significant others.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? ..It was stapled to the chicken.

whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

yaa tsi tsup ari dik ari dull an dik ari dill an dits tan dool la dippyduppy dull la roop uttyroopy la goorigan gook aya gittygangool arup cha cha adippydappydill la baritztandill lan den lan doe a barik kata barip pari baribadeebadeebadee standen lan doe ya baril las ten lan day a doe la babadeadevadevadevaduv ya vou what is that little las day lan doe badakadagadaga doo doo day a doe

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the 1, Blondes aren't any dumber than anyone else. It's a myth.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

Why did the blond crave hotdogs for breakfast? She was likely suffering a sodium deficiency from violently throwing up the night before.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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