Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Poopsack Jones

thumb_up thumb_down +17

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops