Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

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Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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Jokes are funny.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops