A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

Billy: Mom.... Dad, I have decided that I want to live on my own. Parents: Great son! We're so proud of you! Billy: Thanks for your support! Your luggage is outside by the taxi.

What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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