why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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