What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

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you

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killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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My mom's dead

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs? A: Russell

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops