Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

"Hello." "Hi."

A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

why did the 8 year old want a squirt gun? his parents were on fire

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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