You know George Washington? He died.

HTML

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

Pavel Novak

Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

JESSSSIICCCCCAAAAAA!

Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

Obama-Care

What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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