What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

what's funnier than hell? heaven

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

GAY PEOPLE

In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

boobs

Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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