Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

jack shine has boobs

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

Women's Rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

Please don't rape me.

Jake Bowar

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

Nickelback.

a

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

Penis in a box.

Penis jokes.

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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