Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

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69

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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DANA

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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