What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

I have read the Terms of Service.

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

96

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

The horse said "nay."

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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