What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

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Why....... Because.

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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69

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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