Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

What's green and red? A frog in a blender

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

What do you call a woman in a kitchen ? There rightful place.

What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

robin, get in the car.

top kek

What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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