Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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What's 1+1? 69.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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A baby seal walks into a club. :|

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops